On Behalf of our Colts, Dear President Obama...

Dear President Obama,

At this moment you are probably wrapping up your State of Union address, but there is one state that I feel is more important than the rest. Indiana! On behalf of this great state, I would like to ask you for a small favor. I mean this with all due respect but please, for all that is good and holy in this world, please stay away from Indiana for the next 10 days. Please don't call, write, or visit. Most importantly when you refer to our hometown Super Bowl bound football team, please refer to them as your beloved New Orleans Saints' opponents!

Please don't take this as a personal or political attack but as a simple request on behalf of my hometown NFL team that you don't have to mention. I don't know how to delicately say this, but lately you've been Bush-ing things and I can explain why.

You represented the United States, more specifically the city of Chicago, before the International Olympic Committee and that didn't turn out in our favor. You campaigned for Martha Coakley in Massachusetts and she lost "Teddy" Kennedy's seat to Scott Brown. You have also campaigned for Creigh Deeds and John Corzine in the Virginia and New Jersey governors races and they lost. You were even gracious enough to fly down to Georgia and stump for Councilwoman Mary Norwood in the Atlanta mayoral election, but once again came up short.

And finally for the coup de grace, it sure was nice of you to call the undefeated, number one ranked Kentucky Wildcats yesterday. The team helped raise a million dollars towards the relief effort in Haiti and I'm sure it meant so much for them to receive a phone call from the President of the United States. I know you mean well and I also know you're very, very busy so I should tell you that last night those very same Kentucky Wildcats lost to the South Carolina Gamecocks 68 to 62! The Wildcats are undefeated no more.

Sir, if you really appreciate the hoosiers that helped make you the first democratic presidential candidate in quite some time to win our great state, then please don't say anything about our local football team that has a pretty big game coming up next week. How about for the next 10 days, we just don't exist! Lets just say that if you're driving from Washington D.C. to Los Angeles, you'll drive through Ohio, get to the border, and what do you know you're in Illinois already! I hope this doesn't hurt your feelings and I promise this will only be a few days.

Oh, and one more thing. In May when we crown another Indianapolis 500 winner, please stay away from him, or her, as well because their job requires them to move at over 220 miles per hour! I just don't think that would be safe...

I hope there are no hard feelings,



Andy Ashby

Does One Plus One Equal Two Anymore?

"They've done studies you know... 60
percent of the time, it works every time!" Paul Rudd in Anchorman

Today President Obama commented on his 51 percent approval rating at a town hall meeting in Ohio. He said that 51 percent actually demonstrated what a good job he was doing. He went on to say that if half of the country is upset with him, then he is doing fantastic job at stirring up the political arena and changing Washington.

I have only one problem with the president's line of thinking. If poor approval ratings are the best indicator of a truly, good president then why didn't we want four more years of President Bush? The former president's approval rating was much, much lower than 51 percent. So is President Obama really saying that former President Bush is twice as good of a president than he because I think the former president left office with an approval rating of 25 to 30 percent.

This makes me think of opposite day from elementary school. "James, I love you... Ha! It's opposite day so I really said I hate you!"

"Ladies and gentlemen of the American public, today is opposite day so the Jews and Palestinians love each other, the Iranian president has purchased himself a new "members only" jacket, unemployment is at an all time low, and the federal reserve has so much money that they are going to give it back to the American people. I don't appreciate you and God please don't bless America."

What I find so despicable about politics is that the President's "opposite day speech" could very well be the State of the Union address in a few days. Boy, statistics sure are tricky.

Peace at what cost?

One of the major slogans during President Obama's run for the White House was that," a vote for Obama is a vote against Bush." So did this message travel all the way across the Atlantic Ocean to the Nobel selection committee?

Saints and heroes such as Mother Theresa and Martin Luther King, Jr. had to devote their whole lives to peace and they managed to be quite successful without ever putting their name on a ballot. I have a real problem with any politician that is currently holding office to receive the world's most prestigious honor for peace, because I strongly believe that the only politicians that don't have dirt on their hands are the ones that have never held public office. Power and fame corrupt. It's just part of the human condition. Which is why I feel that no active politician should receive such an award.

President Carter dedicated his life after the White House to helping those less fortunate through his tireless work with Habitat for Humanity; completely isolated for his Presidency. There is no way you can honor somebodies commitment to peace while the the fundamental principle of their elected office is to defend this country from foreign aggressors. There is a war ongoing on two fronts of combat and people have been killed under the Obama administration and due to the "War on Terror," more deaths will follow.

Though I congratulate the President on such a prestigious award, I think that the Nobel committee would have made a much stronger statement by not awarding the prize if there were no suitable candidates. One thing that I'm finally learning in life is that in most situations there will never be a winner, but what's most important is how you play the game.