The other day I was paying for my Bob Evans breakfast when the cashier asks, "It's 90 degrees outside and you're taking hot coffee to go?" I chuckled and replied, "It's true, but I figured if I told somebody that I would pay them to kick me in the ass to wake me up that they'd throw me in the insane asylum!" I mention this because for the most part, I feel like I'm asleep all the time. It seems these days that the only hours I'm awake are the hours I spend moving freight at FedEx, and though I don't sleep the remaining 20 hours of the day I almost feel asleep when I'm awake. Now I don't want to be too hard on myself because I've been all over the place emotion wise, and more specifically medication wise, but I just can't sit around and wait for that perfect drug combination to sweep me off my feet and carry me like a magic carpet through all of the challenges and obstacles all the way down to 215. I need a kick in the ass!
Like so many individuals from my generation, I've grown up with this sense of entitlement. I have no idea why because my mother and I got by on very little in my childhood, but there is still this sense of entitlement nonetheless. Truthfully, I don't necessarily think we are the entitlement generation that others have claimed, but I believe that we grew up with this idea that we will always get out more than we put into something. Our education was almost completely based on setting the bar low and teaching so that as many children as possible can get over. All we had to do is show up and we were passed on to college. During that time, people were becoming millionaires overnight as the "dot.com boom" kept skyrocketing. At that time, all you had to do was try and the world was yours. So many people were doing so well with such minimal effort that arrogance became cliché. In my case, growing up I was so much smarter than a lot of my peers and with that came a feeling of superiority as well as a feeling that I just didn't need to try so hard to get by.
Now, I'm still smarter than a lot of my peers AND I've lost a 150 pounds and I feel like I'm a superstar. I feel at this point that if I stand still that the world will come to me. When you combine that with my fear of failing on this tremendous quest it's as if my feet are stuck in concrete. Like I said, I need a kick in the ass! Enter the Summer of Rocky IV. I've always loved the Rocky movies. I've always loved the idea of one man against the world and the forth Rocky movies takes that struggle to the ultimate peak. This killing machine of a man, Soviet Ivan Drago, has killed Rocky's best friend and long time rival so Rocky has to face Drago for revenge and to preserve his best friend's legacy. So to train for this fight, Drago trains with the most advanced technological equipment at the time while Rocky secludes himself to a farm in Siberia where he uses primitive farming tools to train for the fight of his life. By the end of his training Rocky's has a beard, his hair is long, he's dirty and scrappy looking, but he is in the shape of his life and ready to take on this lethal opponent.
So for me, the Summer of Rocky IV begins today! For the next two months, until school starts, it is 30 hours a week of hard work at FedEx along with an intense 6 day per week workout schedule. At this point, nothing else matters except improving my life and pursuing my dreams. Though I'm not training against Ivan Drago, the harsh realities of life is a pretty strong opponent and is an opponent for which I've got to work extra hard to prepare. One of the things I need to improve is this blog. Over the next few weeks you will see this website undergo a facelift as well as a greater commitment to post more often. I am going to return to posting my daily weight, but this site will be so much more. I'm going to start sharing every aspect of my training, from workouts and recipes to helpful products and workout iPod playlists. In return, I hope that you will share your experiences and diet/exercise aides with me as well as the rest of my audience so that we might all make sig
nificant strides together.
nificant strides together.As you can see from the hard work stains on my shirt that day one's workout was quite intense. Here is to committing that every workout from here on out will match or surpass that intensity. As Rocky would say in this situation, "NO PAIN! NO PAIN! NO PAIN!"
Today's weight is 358 pounds.
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The next time you take a picture of yourself at my house, will you clean up the living room first? ;)
ReplyDeleteI think this sense of entitlement is a human condition, not necessarily because of growing up in a certain era or with/without certain privileges. Some people just happen to take it to an extreme. I think we want life to be easier than it is. So, we often sit back and think, "shouldn't I have SOME reward for all of the freaking hard work I've done?" And everyone's sense of what is "hard" work is different.
What I see as being a major societal issue and/or psychological condition is how we respond to that natural feeling. Do you wallow in the loss of something you never had? Do you accept what you have and stay put? Do you accept what you have and truly enjoy it as a blessing? Do you accept what you have but continue to always strive for more? There are problems and benefits to all of these options. And fortunately, as humans, we have the ability to choose to do each of them at different times. Our ability and desire to respond to challenge should stay fluid.
It's a process. Like this blog. :)